Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Joe Fick

Late summer of 2005 we took our third and last child to Oxford, MS, to start college. When it's your third, and it's a boy, it's pretty much 'here ya go kid, give us a call if you need something.'
Oxford is about an hour from Memphis and I had always wanted to visit the famous Beale Street so off we went.
My intention was to hit multiple spots in order to hear as many bands as possible and just see what there was to see. The very first place we went to was the Flying Saucer Café where we saw a 3 man band called The Dempseys. They were mesmerizing. Three fabulous musicians who had an energy and power to them, led by this upright bass player named Joe Fick whose persona dominated the stage.
He is a jockey sized maniac who gets his hands on a bass and drives it hard to the finish line of every song, his face a kinetic combination of contortions that would make Jim Carrey proud.
We finally left to see other bands simply because I felt obligated not to come to Beale and sit in one spot all night, but the rest of the bands paled in comparison and it wasn't long before I was back at the Flying Saucer. I was a Dempseys fan, but mainly I was a Joe Fick fan.
I followed the band from afar and sometimes saw them on Nashville's Broadway as they made their occasional visit. Ultimately the Dempseys broke up and Joe made his way to Nashville permanently in 2009.
It was interesting talking with him at lunch last week without a crowd or a stage or noise.
I think I operate on the assumption that musicians are supernovas whose ultimate genetically wired blowup is a matter of when not if. To the contrary he actually seems grounded and normal, refreshing in his understanding of the daily fragility of his world. Will all the guys in the band show up? Will the bar keep your band? Will the band keep you? Will there be a crowd? Will the tip jar get filled?
The life he leads seems brutal, physically and emotionally.
11 gigs a week, 4 hours each, which means some of those days start at 630PM and end about 3AM the next day. And we're not talking about some desk job, we're talking about non stop high energy performance on every song or you lose the crowd and their tips.
It is bottom line musical capitalism Nashville style: you entertain me, I tip you, otherwise I walk down Broadway till I find somebody better than you. There is a Darwinian feel to it that must hit the newly arrived musicians hard when they come to town chasing their dream.
Days off? Few and far between, and you take them at the risk of being musically Wally Pipp'ed.
Competition for your job? You get comfortable with your skills and place in the pecking order at your own peril. The new young stud might be showing up any day now.
And yet when I ask if he can do this the rest of his life the answer is yes. I don't know how many times in our conversation I heard the phrase 'I just want to play.'
What a powerful creative force that must be inside a musician like him, the constant desire to just keep doing what he does, to just play, on a stage, with a band, and a crowd, night after night.
I just want to play.
We talked about the steady arrival of new talent to town hell bent on "making it." Defined as what, he asked? Is it millions of dollars? Is it a number one single? Is it your face on the billboards?
Or do you just want to play and then see what life brings you?
I just want to play.
Joe has that crazy ass passion. It hits you in the face when you see him on stage and it hits you in the heart when you're lucky enough to just sit and talk to him like I was.
I think Joe Fick is making it and doing it on his own terms and by his own definition. He doesn't kid himself about the business end of music. He's got a girl, a house, a band, and a life.
He just wants to play.
KS

By the way, a great place to catch Joe on Broadway is 5 nights a week at Roberts Western World with the Don Kelley Band, in my opinion the best show on the street.







Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Emotional Earthquake Wrapup

I just returned to Nashville after presenting the seminar in Decatur last night. We had about 20 people and I knew about half of them.
It was an interesting experience for me. The nature of the topic does not lend itself to a lot of freewheeling discussion. People are typically not too crazy about sharing the very reasons why they attended.
So I felt a lot of burden to "carry the show" so to speak for almost 4 hours but over time people loosened up a bit and I felt like we ended on a very positive note for everyone.
I was surprised by the return of some of my own anxiety as I approached the city limits yesterday morning. I didn't expect it. It didn't rock me but but it brought back some names and circumstances that I hadn't thought about for awhile. It passed.
As it turns out the very location I chose for the seminar had some powerfully negative emotion attached to it for one of the attendees which I didn't know until an email arrived today explaining the reasons for the person's attendance.
It's remarkable how geography can connect us to emotions, both for good and for bad.
About a week ago I also sent an optional behavioral assessment out to the attendees and we spent some time discussing the results. Our base genetic wiring for certain personality traits will also have a potent effect on how we respond to emotional trauma. It was good to use the assessment results to further understand how and why we behave certain ways.
I have already received some great, very personal notes back from people who were there last night. I am truly grateful for those.
I don't know if or when I will do this seminar again. I don't feel a burning need to promote it.
I feel a burning need to do it only if there is a group of people somewhere who feel it would help.
KS

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Crazyass Passion Part Two

We got free tickets to a tribute concert to Kris Kristofferson tonight. Willie Nelson, Emmy Lou Harris, Allison Kraus, Martina McBride, and a bunch of other stars.
We left at the intermission and walked a couple of blocks to Roberts Western World on Broadway.
The Don Kelley Band has played there for many years. A friend of mine named Joe Fick plays bass. There is always some interchangeability in the members of the band but the quality of the music is always top drawer. I love listening to them.
These guys play for tips every night and I have yet to see them not play their hearts out on every song. Maybe their hearts aren't always in it but you would never know by watching them.
I'm pretty sure that the stars I saw in the first half of the night at the Bridgestone Arena are passionate about their music.
But I KNOW that the 4 guys I watched at Robert's are crazyass passionate.
It's why there's something about the Broadway scene in Nashville that always pulls me in.
It's a little crass, a little commercial, pretty touristy, but the musicians are crazyass passionate.
I can't resist it. It pulls me in. I will take it over the polish of the big names any day.
KS

Crazyass Passion

"Crazyass passion is the staple of life and persistence its nourishing force. Without them, you cannot cross the trail."
This is the last sentence off the last page of The Oregon Trail: A New American Journey, by Rinker Buck.
I just finished it and I LOVE this book.
You will like it if you enjoy any or all of the following:
Mules
American History
Dysfunctional families
Crazy ideas
Pioneer lore
More crazy ideas.
Basically Rinker and his brother Buck decide to do a modern day, 2000 mile Oregon Trail trek in a covered wagon. Yes. True.
If you have read any of Bill Bryson's books the style will feel familiar. Buck is a great writer and did a tremendous amount of historical research prior to setting off on this trip.
Read it, you won't regret it.
But that's not my point.
I love people with crazyass passion about almost anything. It happens to me a lot, and I get elated by the ups and paralyzed by the downs. And then go back for more.
I hope you have crazyass passion about something. I don't care what it is. Maybe it's God (He probably doesn't care for my phrasing so I will ask forgiveness now), animals, sports, food, cigars, kids, trees, flowers, work, play, or any of about a billion different subjects.
You pick it, I don't care. But somewhere you have to have something that burns at your core and consumes you with a desire to just keep at it, day after day.
It might not work. It might not last. It might not turn out exactly like you imagined.
But remember this quote from Robert Frost:
"Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length."
Go crazy, folks. Go crazy.
KS



Monday, March 7, 2016

Nashville Tourists

Spring is arriving (70 here today) and the tourist activity is really picking up here, you can see it and feel it.
My son has entered the Air BNB world with his house and has put together a very nice set of information that helps visitors find the neighborhood spots that wouldn't be found otherwise.
I know many of you have been down here and perhaps others have trips planned so I thought I would include Kenny's document for your own vacation planning.
He is an expert at learning a city. No dive is too divey for him to walk into and no chain is ever likely to see his shadow. This is the kind of list that will be ever changing but it's a fantastic start for anybody coming to town.
Kenny might also be able to help you find a driver if you need one. :))
We are happy to give advice or answer questions if we can help.


Restaurants, Bars, Breweries, Music, Sites

West Nashville/Sylvan Park (Host neighborhood):

a.       M.L Rose (Address: 2535 Franklin Pike, Nashville, TN 37204) – Great craft brews and excellent patio. Very much within walking distance.

b.      The Beer Pale (Address: 4109 Charlotte Avenue, 42nd Ave N, Nashville, TN 37209) – Steamed sandwiches, great gourmet hot dogs and an excellent selection of rotating craft brews, most of which are locally made.

c.       Flip Burger (Address: 4111 Charlotte Ave, Nashville, TN 37209) – Gourmet burgers.

d.      Hattie B’s (Address: 5209 Charlotte Pike, Nashville, TN 37209) – Famous Nashville Hot Chicken joint. Personal favorite of mine. Careful on the level of hotness. Grab a cold beer to help it down along with southern side dishes. Right down the street!

e.      Wendell Smith Restaurant (Address: 407 53rd Ave N, Nashville, TN 37209) – An old school, southern diner that serves up great breakfast, burgers and sweet tea.

f.        Betty’s Grill (Address: 407 49th Ave N, Nashville, TN 37209) – Dive bar, nuff said. No liquor here, just cold beer. Good burger and wings.

g.       Cool Stuff Weird Things (Address: 4900 Charlotte Pike, Nashville, TN 37209) – The name of the store explains the place. Grab some Nashville paraphernalia in this store which offers a widespread selection of vintage items and accessories. Right next to Betty’s.

h.      Centennial Bar and Grill (Address: 5113 Centennial Blvd, Nashville, TN 37209) – New, neighborhood dive bar. Awesome craft beer selection and sandwiches. They serve Coors Original on tap which is rare and a favorite of mine.

i.         Fifty First Kitchen and Bar (Address: 5104 Illinois Ave, Nashville, TN 37209) – Small plate food, farm to table, wines. Very new to the area and great atmosphere.

j.        Star Bagel Café (Address: 4504 Murphy Rd, Nashville, TN 37209) – Locally owned and operated. Bagels, wraps, healthy eating. Grab a fruit tea or a coffee in the morning.

k.       The Local Taco (Address: 4501 Murphy Rd, Nashville, TN 37209) – Local taco joint with a great patio.

l.         Neighbors Bar of Sylvan Park (Address: 4425 Murphy Rd, Nashville, TN 37209) – Personal favorite of mine. Neighborhood bar always filled with locals. Great bartenders, good specials and the best chicken wings in Nashville. Grab a bar stool and enjoy their smoked meats. A D.J. or band will play weekend nights.

m.    Café Nonna (Address: 4427 Murphy Rd, Nashville, TN 37209) – Locally owned and operated Italian food. Featured on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives.

n.      Bros Cajun Cuisine (Address: 3214 Charlotte Ave, Nashville, TN 37209) – Laid back Cajun joint. Great jambalaya, po’ boys and crawfish. Another hole in the wall favorite of mine. 

o.      Climb Nashville (Address: 3600 Charlotte Ave, Nashville, TN 37209) – If you’re wanting some group exercise, visit Climb Nashville and their indoor rock climbing facilities. Very close to home.

p.      Jimmy Kelly’s (Address: 217 Louise Ave, Nashville, TN 37203) – Family-run steakhouse with old, southern charm. Some of these waiters have been serving up steaks and wine since mid-1900! Cozy atmosphere.


Downtown/Midtown/The Gulch

q.      Broadway (Downtown) – Hard to make a Nashville trip complete without visiting Broadway in downtown Nashville. Uber to Broadway, walk down the street, bar hop and listen to great county music. Remember, musicians play for tips!

                                                               i.      Favorites: Tootsies, Roberts Western World, The Stage, Acme

r.        Printers Alley (Downtown) – An alley downtown which offers various bars and blues joints. Just ask any local downtown and they’ll let you know where it is. Easy walk from Broadway.

s.       John Seigenthaler Pedestrian Bridge (Downtown near Broadway) – Don’t leave Nashville until you take a stroll over the Pedestrian Bridge downtown over the Cumberland River. Great views of the city.

t.        The Johnny Cash Museum and Café (Downtown, Address: 119 3rd Ave S, Nashville, TN 37201). Great museum of the iconic, Johnny Cash!

u.      Yazoo Brewing Company (Address: 910 Division St, Nashville, TN 37203) – Local brewery, great taproom and tour.

v.       Jackalope Brewing Company (Address: 701 8th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37203) – Another great local brewery and taproom near downtown. Very close to Yazoo.

w.     Peg Leg Porker (Address: 903 Gleaves St, Nashville, TN 37203) – Best ribs in Nashville as far as I’m concerned. Located right by Yazoo Brewing, this joint is locally owned and has fantastic pork BBQ.

x.       3rd & Lindsley Bar and Grill (Address: 818 3rd Ave S, Nashville, TN 37210) – One of the great Nashville spots to stop in to hear live music. Famous acts have been known to show up unexpectedly.

y.       Husk (Address: 37 Rutledge St, Nashville, TN 37210) – Farm to table. Exceptional brunch and dinner.

z.       Virago (Address: 1126 McGavock St, Nashville, TN 37203) – Hip hangout near downtown known for exceptional Asian fusion cuisine and cocktails.

aa.   Whiskey Kitchen (Address: 118 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37203) – Rustic bar/restaurant which a great bourbon selection and grub.

bb.  Kayne Prime Steakhouse (Address: 1103 McGavock St, Nashville, TN 37203) – Best steak in town, hands down. Reservations needed. Dress code.

cc.    Nashville Farmer’s Market (Address: 900 Rosa L Parks Blvd, Nashville, TN 37208) – A gem for our city. Each weekend local farmers, producers and merchants gather to bring their goods, arts and crafts to this establishment. Highly recommend a visit for a couple hours.



East Nashville

dd.  Rumours East (Address: 1112 Woodland St, Nashville, TN 37206)

ee.  The Pharmacy Burger Parlor and Beer Garden (Address: 731 Mcferrin Ave, Nashville, TN 37206) – One of the best burgers in Nashville. Be prepared to wait if you go at lunch.

ff.     3 Crow Bar (Address: 1024 Woodland St, Nashville, TN 37206) – Dive bar that defines East Nashville. Very local, little hipster, good beer bar and music.

gg.   The Treehouse (Address: 1011 Clearview Ave, Nashville, TN 37206)

hh.  Five Points Pizza (Address: 1012 Woodland St, Nashville, TN 37206) – Voted one of the best pizza joints in the city.

ii.       Mas Tacos (Address: 732 Mcferrin Ave, Nashville, TN 37206) – Small Mexican joint offering amazing Mexican street food with a twist. Featured on Diners, Drive Ins, and Dives.

jj.      Barista Parlor (Address: 519 Gallatin Ave, Nashville, TN 37206) – Hip coffee parlor. One of my favorite places to visit on a nice morning.

Germantown

kk.   Germantown Café (Address: 1200 5th Ave N, Nashville, TN 37208) – In the heart of Germantown which is within walking distance of downtown. Great upscale café offering southern cuisine.

ll.       312 Pizza Company (Address: 371 Monroe St, Nashville, TN 37208) – I’m originally from Chicago so this place is near and dear. Great brews and deep dish pizza.

mm.                      Butchertown Hall (Address: 1416 4th Ave N, Nashville, TN 37208) – Great beer garden and smoked meats.

nn.  5th and Taylor (Address: 1411 5th Ave N, Nashville, TN 37208) – Unbelievable atmosphere and food. One of the hottest places to eat in town. Try the quail.

oo.  Silo (Address: 1121 5th Ave N, Nashville, TN 37208) – Upscale southern bistro. A favorite of mine. Try to deviled egg appetizer.

pp.  Nashville Sounds AAA Baseball (Address: 19, Jr Gilliam Way, Nashville, TN 37219) – Nashville is home to the Athletic A’s AAA baseball club. They play at First Tennessee Park which is between Germantown and Downtown. Cheap tickets, great beer and ball game grub, and a perfect way to spend an afternoon.

12 South Avenue

qq.  12 South Taproom (Address: 2318 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204) – Local beers and great bar grub. Perfect on a sunny day.

rr.     Burger Up (Address: 2901 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204)

ss.    Bartaco (Address: 2526 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204) – New joint in the 12 South neighborhood offering great tacos and small plates.

tt.     Edley’s Bar-B-Que (Address: 2706 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204) – Great brisket!

uu.  Epice (Address: 2902 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204) – A favorite of mine. This small bistro offers a twist on Lebanese cuisine.

vv.   Josephine (Address: 2316 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204)

ww.                       Mafiaoza’s (Address: 2400 12th Ave S, Nashville, TN 37204) – Neighborhood pizza joint. Grab a slice and a pitcher of beer.





Other Places of Interest

xx.   Arrington Vineyards (Address: 6211 Patton Rd, Arrington, TN 37014) – Our very own vineyard south of the city. Decent drive to get there but with great weather it’s an enjoyable afternoon to taste wine.

yy.   Downtown Franklin, TN (Franklin, TN) – Old southern square with a variety of boutiques, vintage shops, bars and restaurants. About a 30 minute drive south of the house. 

zz.    Hillsboro Village (Near Belmont University) – Park the car and walk the street. Great restaurants include Belcourt Taps and Tapas, Double Dogs, McDougal’s and The Villager Tavern (dive bar with darts).

aaa.                        International Market and Restaurant (Address: 2010 Belmont Blvd, Nashville, TN 37212) – Authentic Thai grocery and restaurant. You won’t find this unless you’re a local. Great Pad Thai and the owners are wonderful people. PT’s and BLVD are across the street which are also great places to stop in for a drink or snack.

bbb.                      McCabe Golf Course (Address: 4601 Murphy Rd, Nashville, TN 37209) – Public course, 18 and 9 hold options. Fairly easy course and would be fun for a group that doesn’t take the sport that seriously. Also next to Neighbors Bar in Sylvan Park.





               


















Saturday, March 5, 2016

Wick-It Part II

I got my piece posted by Wick-It on his FB page. I love the comments and thought you might like reading them too.
https://m.facebook.com/DJWickit/posts/10153318771661817

Wick-It the Instigator

The first DJ I remember was Johnny Rabbitt. He was on KXOK, a typical 1960's AM Top 40 station in St. Louis. Every week they put out some kind of a yellow sheet that showed the rankings of the records and a bullet to the side indicating the trend line of sales. It was a world of 45s.
The along came FM and suddenly that's where all the cool DJs were.
The real hippie station in St. Louis was KSHE 95 in the late 60s and early 70s. The DJs spoke in hushed, "like wow, far out man", tones and they played long songs, not limited by the AM demands for songs in the 2 minute mode. It was the only place you could hear the entire drum solo from In a Gadda da Vida if you didn't own the record. It came out in 1968 and was 17 minutes and 2 seconds long.
Then radio stations started being bought up and playlists were set and suddenly radio all sounded the same again. Tom Petty wrote about it in The Last DJ.
All of these DJs played music but regardless of the era the music was from a band, written and performed by that band, and produced and marketed by a music company.
Then along came the world of electronics.
Suddenly you could sample, mix, remix, mashup. Words that never even existed before suddenly described what some guy was doing in the privacy of his own home.
Welcome to the world of Andrew Owsley, otherwise know as Wick-It the Instigator, the guy with 20 million hits on SoundCloud.
Wick-It is 36. I met him while driving him to the airport to do a show in Iowa City last week. I thought, 'Ok, DJ, dance party, white wannabe rapper.' He casually mentioned his grandma 'was a Helm.' For the uninitiated that is Helm as in Levon Helm, the extraordinary drummer/singer from The Band. That is a musical root par excellence. My curiosity was piqued,. so this week we found some time for the education of Ken in regard to some of today's music scene. Boy, did I get an education.
He doesn't do dances, he does concerts. People buy tickets and sit and watch and listen. I know this must sound terribly old of me but I had to sit and digest that for a minute. He's on stage with a computer, a mixer and maybe some lights and stuff. He IS the band. No Jimi setting his guitar on fire. No Townsend smashing his amp. No Joe Walsh too screwed up to remember his lyrics.
 It's Wick-It and his computer.
In concert.
So now my head is spinning, total cognitive dissonance, simultaneously rejecting and reaching for the new concept in front of me. Ok, keep talking Andrew, or Wick-It, or whatever I am actually supposed to call you while having coffee. I have to gain an understanding of this, I suddenly feel like too much of some world is not only passing me by but I'm not even aware of its existence.
It's vaguely reminiscent of the first time I heard the White Album. I said what is this? I don't understand these songs. Where in the world did this come from? Give me more.
Well you need to start by listening. He tells me he has this Johnny Cash Walk the Line remix. I'm listening to it as I type. Were it a record I would be reaching for it to stop the skips. Here it is for your listening pleasure. Be advised some of you are going to hate it. I didn't care for it at first listening. I like it more and more.

https://soundcloud.com/wick-it/johhny-cash-i-walk-the-line

A couple of points here. If you strip out the Johnny Cash part all of the other music was created by Wick-It sitting at home with a keyboard and a computer. He can't play Walk the Line to 20 somethings at a concert. But he says when he plays it his way the crowd loves it and he feels like he exposes the classic Cash to a whole new crowd. And of course for me it's in reverse, he exposes me to Wick-It World by using Cash as the hook.
Here's some Pink Floyd for you.

https://soundcloud.com/wick-it/pink-floyd-have-a-cigar-wick

This is his career and full time job. He has a booking agent and performs 100-120 shows per year across the country. He has original music for sale on ITunes. He has fans who follow him. He obviously is a musician, you can't do what he does without musical talent. He plays a guitar and I suspect plays it better than he lets on. He has a sound in his head and he puts it together electronically instead of using a band.
I'm still trying to make sense of this, it's just so new to me. I need to learn more.
So, if you're looking for me on April 30 you will likely find me in Murfreesboro, TN, at the Wick-It the Instigator concert. Far out man.
KS







Friday, March 4, 2016

Friday Musings

I drove this morning. The riders were sickeningly normal. We can't continue this way Uber Rider Nation. Don't you know I need your odd jobs, odd lives, and odd personalities in order to find my own normality?
I need the mad, the bad, the sad, and the ide rich.
Bring me your weirdness, your dysfunction, your muddled asses. The warmth and comfort of the Big Red Truck await you where you can spill your guts to Big Ken. Don't worry, he will only tell a few thousand of his closest acquaintances about you on Facebook and Twitter.
But I digress.
What I really meant to write about today is something that has bothered me for a long time.
Who is it, after all, that writes those sayings inside Chinese fortune cookies? Doesn't that bother you, not knowing? These strangers who purport to know our future after selling us a couple of servings of fried rice?
For a long time it was apparently Donald Lau, an accountant for God's sake.
Here's a link if you need a lot of detail:

http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2005/06/06/cookie-master

(And by the way if you need a lot of detail on this topic I would love to be your Uber driver a couple of times.)

I can see Donald's face on the Mt. Rushmore of Chinese restaurants. Maybe along with the inventor of MSG, the person who thought of putting sweet and sour together in a way you can never taste the sour, and of course, the person who came up with Moo Goo Gai Pan.
Isn't that so lyrical? I love saying it. It makes me feel fashionably international, like I'm getting ready to do a Most Interesting Man in the World commercial.
I don't really like the dish but sometimes order it just so I can say it out loud. Moo. Goo. Gai. Pan.
Just savor the beauty of that phrase. Roll it around in your mouth like a steamed wonton.
Well, enough of that. I'm off to have lunch with DJ Andrew, who when asked by me if he wanted to get together famously replied:
"I be down to meet up."
So, if you're ever in Nashville, I Be Down To Meet Up.
KS


Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Update

Greetings. Sorry for the gap between posts, I've been busy with a lot of things.
1. First, the Emotional Earthquake seminar on Tuesday March 22, 2016.
This will start at 430PM and is intended to finish by 830PM.
I have reserved the Scovill Garden House at the Scovill Zoo for the event. I remember having meetings there before and I think it has an ambience that works well for our session.
I will be there between 330 and 4 to get setup and we will start promptly at 430.
I only have about 4-6 spaces left. Some of you have indicated that you might be bringing another person, if so please let me know ASAP. If you have not signed up but are intending to I encourage you to do so soon. The cost is $40 and you may pay me that night in cash or check.
Please let me know if you have any questions.
2. I am officially incorporated now as Nashville Thinker, LLC. Ta da! I have a bank account and a credit card and everything. I have slowed down working on the website for now. The blog seems to suit my needs at this point so I think I will let things play out before devoting more time and energy to the website.
3. I leave next Tuesday for Arizona. I will spend three days in training with a firm that specializes in human resource assessment tools intended to help both individuals and businesses. Those of you that are familiar with Gallup Strengthsfinder would find these assessments to be far deeper and comprehesive. This is going to be my area of focus from a business development point of view and I have a couple of different avenues to explore here in Nashville. More details to follow.
4. I had to put on slacks, a dress shirt, and a sport coat TWICE last week! I think I'll avoid that as much as possible.
5.  I walked with the 48 pound weight vest in work boots yesterday for the first time in a while, I'm feeling it today. I'm looking for tires and a sledgehammer. Flip, push, pull, jump, hit, carry, it ain't complicated folks.
Later
KS

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Leonard Sterling

I used to be involved in the industry associated with the sales and distribution of printed materials.
More precisely I was involved in the sales and distribution of newspapers.
Even more precisely I was a newspaper boy.
I spent my grade school years in University City, a near west suburb of St. Louis. When I say near west I mean on one side was the city and the other side was the suburb.
U City was a heavily Jewish community. Jewish temples, delis, and bakeries were everywhere.
Down the street from me was a small orthodox temple. I learned that if I would hang around there around sundown on Fridays they would pay me a quarter to turn on their lights. I used to ask my Mom why they just didn't do it themselves. Later on I realized orthodox Jews weren't allowed to operate things like like switches from sundown Friday to sundown Saturday. I have no idea who turned the lights off but it wasn't me.
I attended Delmar Harvard grade school grades 4-6.  It's still there, I looked a few weeks ago, at the northwest corner of Delmar and Kingsland. My newspaper stand was on the northeast corner.
Back in the day, maybe 1963-66, St. Louis had two newspapers. The Globe Democrat published in the morning and the Post Dispatch in the afternoon.
The corner of Delmar and Kingsland was busy after school. A street car line ran Delmar at first and was replaced by busses taking commuters from the downtown offices back out to the "suburbs."
I would get two deliveries of papers, about 55 each time. The last delivery was the 3 star and it had all the final stock prices in it. Often a bus would stop and a guy would holler out wanting the 3 star and I would sell it through the bus window.
The paper sold for 7 cents and I received 2.5 cents per paper sold. Can you imagine that? The company was profitable on 4.5 cents per paper. So I could make a couple of bucks a day, a lot of money for a kid in the sixties.
Fortunately or unfortunately there was an ice cream store on that very corner called Martha Washington's. Much of my profit never left that corner.
After the sixth grade we moved to the Normandy district and I met a friend named Vince Painter. It was through Vince that I met Leonard Sterling.
Leonard weighed 400 pounds. He was Jewish. He wore thick black framed glasses. He had a high pitched, whiny, nasally voice. He and his Dad Irving owned I&L Delivers, meaning Irving and Leonard's newspaper route.
Leonard had a truck about the size of a UPS truck only shorter. It had sliding doors on both sides of the front. The side panels were cut out and replaced by heavy rollup plastic and canvas.
On Saturday nights Leonard would pick up Vince and I. We sat in the back and rolled the Sunday edition, all 1000-1200 of them. Leonard loved country music and would sit in the front singing along to this godawful scratchy AM radio in the truck.
That voice was like fingernails on a chalk board.
To roll a fat Sunday paper you take the closed end and place it in your lap near your belly. Roll it tightly and take it through a figure 8 in the string tying machine. Then you slam it down in order to trigger the tying and cutting mechanism of the machine. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
When we were done we got to stand in the passenger front door opening and throw. Leonard would say 'Okay, Smithmier, corner house, skip 2, 3 in a row, skip 1, hit 2." He had the route memorized.
There was an art to throwing. You needed to hit the sidewalk. You needed to get close to the door. However if you threw it too flat and hit the sidewalk it would skid and tear. You needed some loft. Kind of like a short iron to the green.
We had a run at midnight and a run at 3. Between runs Leonard took us to Pratzel's Bakery on Eastgate, this fabulous Jewish bakery. He knew the owner and they would open the back door for us and let us get free freshly baked pastries at 3AM. OMG, the greatest things I ever tasted.
Somewhere along the 2 years I worked for Leonard he decided to go on a diet. I think he just quit eating. He said he dropped to 160 but I swear he didn't look it. But being the kindhearted teenagers that we were Vince and I would wave donuts in Leonards face, come on Leonard, we know you want this, we know it, watch this Leonard, and then we would shove an entire donut in our mouths. Never fazed him.
Leonard was a good guy. Once in a while we would roll on a weekday and he would take us bowling. He only paid for one game but he didn't even have to do that for us.
Leonard Sterling is another one of those people in my past that deserved better from me.
You might think that I'm wrapped up in regret over people like Arno and Leonard. Nope.
Remember this: There's no reason to feel bad about how you used to be. Just feel bad if you don't change.
KS



Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Arno Kracht


Mr. Kracht taught English at Normandy High School in St. Louis. Somehow I would up in an Honors English class in my junior year and he got stuck with me.
That would have been the school year of 1971-72 and I would say he was about 30 at the time.
My high school had the honor of being the first in St. Louis to experience race riots. I'm talking fights, bats, chains, desks being thrown out upper story windows, teachers with nervous breakdowns, the whole nine yards. That was followed by chain link fencing, school IDs, security guards, etc.
A really great environment for an already semi dysfunctional teenager like me.
Like so often happens in troubled schools today there are always teachers who just keep trying to do their job in the midst of the turmoil all around them. Thus was Mr. Kracht.
One day we had to do an in class assignment on Chaucer's Canterbury Tales. Even a screw up like me had a hard time avoiding an assignment due in 20 minutes. We had to take one of the tales and rewrite it from medieval English to modern. I chose the Miller.
At the end of the class, much to my chagrin, he chose mine to read aloud. Then he kept me after class to talk to me.
He said he knew I could do that kind of work all of the time and he just didn't understand why I didn't.
I looked at him and said I knew I could too but saw no reason to prove it to anyone other than myself.
Wasn't that just a terrible thing to say? It embarrasses me to this day. My behavior didn't deserve a teacher like him.
I made a brief attempt at doing a blog about 5 years ago. I wrote about Mr. Kracht then. For a variety of reasons I stopped blogging and sometime after I would up learning that someone read the post, knew him, sent it to him, and he tried to contact me. The person said Mr. Kracht had indicated he didn't remember me being such a jerk to him. Unfortunately by that time I had stopped checking the blog and never got to talk to him.
I owed him a thank you for his effort. Even if he didn't remember my behavior I obviously do and he deserved  better from me.
Every one of you has somebody like Mr. Kracht in your past. You better find them and thank them before it's too late for either of you. Otherwise you will just sit and around and remember your own personal Mr. Kracht stories and wish you had done better.

Sunday, February 21, 2016

Random Post

Son Mike came from Oxford this weekend to see everyone in Nashville. As part of the moving process several tubs of old stuff got redistributed out to the kids. As he was going through his he found some old pictures of mine and got them put on a DVD. They're all from my Navy days and all of other people except this beauty:
I just knew you were all dying to see such a lovely photo of me. That is actually me on the top bunk in case you couldn't tell. Yes I'm sleeping with a guitar.
Side story--I had my appendix out I think in the summer before my freshman year in high school. I succeeded in talking my mother into buying me a guitar. But I didn't know how to play. The music store had a Lennon/McCartney song book that showed where your fingers went for each chord in a song. So that summer I took the book and taught myself to play guitar by looking at the pictures. Over the years I have used the same learning method to try and teach myself how to coach grade school basketball and rewire my old house in Nebraska. I achieved the same level of mediocrity in all three endeavors.
Back to the picture.
That is a room in the barracks at Submarine Base, Pearl Harbor, late 1973.
My bunkmate was Cal. Cal was a tobacco chewing good ol' boy, a very good guy, a machinist's mate on one of the boats. (In the Navy subs are boats and surface vessels are ships.)
He was my first bunkmate when I arrived there from Hospital Corps School in San Diego.
I loved the duty there. Submariners are their own special breed. You have to be to do what they do.
At the time Sub Base had its own dispensary. Two docs and maybe 5-6 Corpsmen. The only people that treated Corpsmen ("docs") better than submariners were Marines. We had it made.
I turned 19 at that place and omg did they throw me a party.
I dropped out of high school to join the Navy in 1972 and had my 18th birthday in boot camp. It turned my life around. I had a new start. Nobody knew me or my history. I had no rep to live up to anymore. And I met a system I knew I couldn't change, so I had to learn to maneuver and thrive within it. And I did.
One day one of the docs gave me a flyer detailing a program whereby high performing enlisted men could apply for midshipman status at the Naval Academy. He said all the officers thought I should go and I would have the CO's support. I remember being intimidated by the prospect and distinctly recall dropping it in the trash can, to the right of the door, in the first exam room on the right, as you walked down the hall from the check in desk.
It's my only regret of that time. I've tried ever since to not let things like that scare me.
KS


Saturday, February 20, 2016

Grandpa and Hannah

This week is busy around here. My wife will be in week 2 of the new job, fewer hours than the first week but busy nonetheless. My daughter and son in law take 4 year old Cameron to Disney for the first time Wednesday thru Sunday. Soooo on Thursday morning that leaves me to get 18 month old Hannah up, fed, changed, dressed, and off to day care. And then on Saturday from about 8-3 it is Hannah and Grandpa.
Daughter Sarah takes great delight in this prospect. Though she won't come out and say it I know she has at least a little of 'OMG' in her about Grandpa and Hannah alone for these stretches.
One of the great things that has happened to me over the last few weeks is being this close to my grandchildren. Only now have I realized that in all my other visits I wasn't really "here." The job followed me. Texts, emails, phone call, phone conferences. Body in Nashville, mind in Decatur.
Now I am actually understanding these two little personalities.
Cameron is just like his Dad. A little reserved, analytical, methodical. This morning I made the awful mistake of trying to dress him in the wrong order. He explained to me that it must be underwear, pants, shirt, socks, shoes. In. That. Order.
With Cameron there is a process and you will follow it. Yes boss.
I have come to describe Hannah as exuberant. She hollers in the truck for the sheer pleasure of making noise. If there is something that can be climbed you will see her on top of it. If there is a spot to be entered she is already in it.
So when it is just me with her I will revert to my fundamental premise of child raising: Just Give Them What They Want.
It's not as permissive as it sounds, it's just that I learned a long time ago that logic and rationality rarely work with a toddler. As long as what they want it is no worse than aggravation then just give it to them. They only stay with it for about a minute anyway.
So next Saturday Hannah and I are going to Costco. Food always placates her. I think we can spend at least an hour hitting all the food sampling stations that I usually stroll right by. Maybe a stop by Uncle Kenny's for coffee. Maybe a playground if the weather is nice. Then her nap.
Before I moved down here I had good conversation with a long time friend of mine, Duane Noland. Many of you know him. One of the best guys around, always too good for the ugly Illinois political world he lived in for a few years.
We talked about grandchildren and he said "You know, being a grandpa is a mighty calling."
How right he was and the statement really hit home with me.
Whether it's your friends or your family please think about being "there" fully when you're with them. Don't fall into the body there, mind gone trap that I was in for awhile. You miss too much and it's just not worth it.
I will miss Cameron while he's gone but I can't wait till it's time for just Grandpa and Hannah.
KS



Thursday, February 18, 2016

More Email from Friends

In the Understand phase of the CURE we first work through the Who What and Why of your earthquake.
The Who might be a person, a company, God, or all of the above for that matter. It typically is some target for your anger.
The What is the core issue that really eats at you. It might be the actual event, it might be the way the event occurred, it might be some deep personal feeling that the event brought out in you. Getting at the What helps you deal with it.
The Why won't always apply to everyone but often there is a Why that causes that What to hurt so bad. What is the Why in your case?
It's important to be brutally honest with yourself on these questions even though the process may be painful.
And then we get to the fourth W, When. When are you finally going to let go of the Who, What, and Why and move on with your life?
I've had an email exchange with a friend who now lives in another state. Moving was part of her way of dealing with an earthquake. Early on she asked the very basic question of 'Why can't I just stay mad?' I said you can, as long as staying mad doesn't turn into bitterness and anger and start to affect your relationships with those who matter to you.
Last night she wrote this to me:


In all honesty, I would have to admit the anger has taken on a life of its own and is leading me towards bitterness-not good.  An obstacle I have had is discerning between forgiveness and letting go.  If I forgive am I saying 'hey, what happened is ok' vs. letting go and saying 'hey what happened happened and I am moving on'.  Sounds simple enough to a point but a fine line and work in progress for me.  Then I read your reply.  I have to say when I have felt the anger coming on, I ask myself when I am going to be ready to get over it......a question I have to answer with 'now' because life is good!

Unfortunately this is the case for many people after these earthquake events. The acute trauma turns into chronic anger, hanging around their neck like a boat anchor, locking them in place for the rest of their lives.
Note the comment that getting past it doesn't mean forgiving it. You don't have to forget it you just can't afford to relive it every day.
Listen, it's not easy getting past this stuff, I get that.  You just have to do it and I don't know of any other way to say it. Maybe I help you, maybe a friend or family member helps you, maybe a pastor helps you, maybe you figure it out on your own, I don't care what the pathway is but you have to make that big step. When you do you are going to have that feeling of that boat anchor getting pulled off your shoulders.
I replied to last night's email as follows:

Two things. 
1. If now is now then do it. You can't really commit to the new if you're hanging onto the old. 
2.  You will have occasional flashbacks and setbacks. Expect it. They're temporary.

This is true for everybody and I've experienced it. There is no straight line up for shaking this stuff. 
The setbacks will happen, they will become less frequent, they will become more tolerable, but they probably won't go to zero.
Maybe today is your When day, when you finally start letting go and moving ahead. At least try it. It won't make you feel any worse than you've been feeling and you know I'm right about that.
KS